Do you FEAR Feedback?

By: Sonia Di Maulo, Founder and Lead Feedback Enthusiast

We all fear feedback.

  • OFFERING? Giving tough-to-hear feedback keeps us up at night.
  • RECEIVING? Receiving tough-to-hear feedback can derail our focus.

What happens if we don’t do feedback well?

  • OFFERING? We could potentially deliver the wrong message. Instead of giving feedback to realign expectations, we communicate that all is well. Not good! Or we can completely demotivate to the point of paralysis. Ouch… negative engagement impacts business results.
  • RECEIVING? We could potentially kill our own motivation without asking the right questions to get more concrete feedback to help us excel. Or we can dismiss feedback too quickly that can actually be the best advice we ever got!

Fact is, we rarely get training and coaching on how to provide and receive tough-to-hear feedback. As a feedback enthusiast, I have read, practiced, trained and coached employees and leaders globally to offer and receive feedback with grace and in a way that respects the person behind the feedback and impacts business results.

Here are two quick tips you can do right away that will help you overcome the fear:

  • OFFERING? Focus on the person receiving the feedback… what can you say that will help them truly hear what you are saying… after all the feedback is for their benefit and it will only be helpful if it gets used. BONUS: What you say will tell more about you than the receiver of the feedback – so choose your words carefully and ensure they reflect your guiding principles and values.
  • RECEIVING? Protect your motivation and be prepared to ask professional questions to get to tangible tasks that will propel your performance to the next step. And then keep a feedback diary to measure feedback outcomes.

And feel free to download my newest Infographic: The 3Fs – How to Use Feedback to Expose Extraordinary Performance. Your feedback is always welcome. For a printed version, connect with me.


I welcome and respond to comments below.


At Harvest Performance, we use the power of authentic feedback to help Leaders Cultivate Trust & Collaboration. How do you cultivate trust & collaboration to positively impact those around you?


Sonia Di Maulo (MA, CRP), founder of Harvest Performance, is an author, feedback enthusiast, and performance improvement professional. She helps leaders around the world emerge and doesn’t plan on stopping any time soon.Sonia has 14 years experience as a performance improvement professional helping Leaders and HR Executives increase leadership effectiveness that grows team trust and collaboration and decreases conflict, turnover and time managing stress. Using proven performance improvement practices and principles from her book, The Apple in the Orchard, her clients see a 55% improvement in their work environment and team engagement.

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